Tomorrow is my last day of "work" before I have babies. I've continued to work from home although nowhere near a full schedule, and it's been good for my mental sanity and to stay connected. I am very lucky to have wonderful co-workers who have picked up my parts of projects and will cover for me while I'm out. It's going to be so weird not being attached to a laptop or blackberry for the first time since....October 2008? Wow.
David and I went for a nice walk last night and tonight, and I went for a really long walk this morning. Nothing doing. The babies were "textbook" at their NST/BPP today, so that's exciting. The nurse congratulated me on getting so far with them. I'm really proud too, but I don't feel right accepting congratulations. I know that every mom with a premature baby or babies in the NICU wanted to make it to full term too, and I don't think I "deserve" this more than any of them, or that they did anything wrong or should feel bad. When I was first on bedrest and when I first got my GD diagnosis, I felt like my body had failed me and that my body was rejecting my babies. I felt so guilty. But I hadn't done anything wrong--it was just what was happening. Same thing here--yes I was very careful with bedrest, but bedrest doesn't work for everyone. I just got lucky. I am glad something finally seems to have gone right, but I'm not going to take it for granted. I'm very grateful to David for everything he did to keep me and the babies safe, and I believe my mom is protecting them from Heaven.
It is now my favorite time of day--bedtime snack! No Sugar Added ice cream is actually pretty darn delicious, and David found my favorite flavor--Mint Chocolate Chip. Snack time! Maybe the cold will move the babies along?
Good luck this weekend! I understand your feelings. I also feel very fortunate that my babies have made it this long. We are lucky that our babies will most likely be good weights and not need NICU time. Can't wait to see pictures of your little ones! All the best.
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